This is a picture of me living my dream of being Cinderella. I didn't want to mop the floors or take crap from a pair of ugly step sisters but I did want to ride in a beautiful coach and meet a handsome prince. Well at least I got the coach!

That was Saturday. A long but lovely day where I helped 10 families celebrate their daughters Quinceaneras Disney style.

Today was a different day.

Today was all about sweating. Sweating on the job during a video interview and then sweating at my workout.

What's so good about sweat? Is your workout better if you sweat? Are you sweating out toxins? Did my Secret hold up or as I write this am I smelling to high heaven?

If you know the answer to any of these questions I'd love to hear them!

Vacation Alert!

This photo was taken at Pepe's in Provincetown, MA yesterday, Saturday August 9, 2008.

My brother in law, Jonathan flew us to Ptown where my cousin Peter and his wife greeted us and gave us a fabulous tour of the town and of their fabulous shop, the Purple Feather. The Purple Feather is a dessert shop...being a food addict runs in the family. They make gelato, chocolates, fudge, coffees and also serve fancy desserts. The store is beautiful and there was a time in my life when I couldn't have concentrated on anything they told me while I was there. I would have been focused soley on trying to eat my way through the store!



It was a gloriously gorgeous and relaxing day. I've had a lot of vacation time lately...4 days in Biloxi, MS with my Mom, 5 days of Shakespeare with Heart theatre camp but yesterday was the first day that felt like a vacation. THANK YOU JONATHAN!



Now for my eating/exercising update...My food is all over the place. I've not been eating totally clean but I'm not eating my normal 3 meals a day with nothing in between either. Interestingly, I'm not feeling bad about it. I'm feeling like I'm doing the best I can without becoming a turbo charged anal retentive perfectionist...which is part of my addict self. I've often lived in the black or the while but not in the gray. Right now the way I'm dealing with my food feels very gray. I guess that can be a good thing but I also feel like I need to closely watch my carb intake. For me carbs are killers.

I haven't formally exercised since right before I went to Biloxi on July 24th.
I did bring my sneakers and work out clothes to MA so I'm committing right here and now to do at least two forty five minute walks while I'm here.

All in all, my life is good. I have family and friends who love me. I'm getting to see my sisters, brother in law, neices and nephews. I can't complain...and I can do it all while fitting into the airplane seat without a seat belt extender!

Why a blog?

I've been thinking a lot about my weight lose journey lately.

Do I know anything that can help others?

Is there someone who can relate to me and my story?

In case the answer to the two questions above is yes, I've decided to start a blog.

I've lost close to 200 pounds...I say close to because from day to day the number of pounds lost can change! For the most part I've maintained a 190-200 pound weight lose since 2006.

How did I do it?

I ate right and exercised....

I also had the help of a gastric bypass.

Was the gastric bypass the cure?

NO.

The bypass gave me a head start and allowed me to have hope, but when push comes to shove and you're a few years post op the surgery does you little to no good. I'm constantly reminded that to be at a healthy weight the secret is not a secret at all...

I need to eat right and exercise!

I exercise 3 days a week at the gym and I take a belly dancing class as another form of getting my body and energy moving.

For the most part I eat right.

Today wasn't an "eatin' right" kind of a day.

I've nibbled tonight. For me nibbling is a sickness. I lose count of what I've eaten when I just keep shoveling little bits into my mouth.

I feel good about my eating when I eat what my body craves. For the last few weeks it's craved vegetables. I made a vegetable stew. I made my own cauliflower soup and braised cabbage. YUM.

I don't always eat what my body craves.

Sometimes I succumb to what my obsession craves. My obsession never craves healthy things. My obsession craves sweets or crunchy foods. Because there is so many sugar free options, I can easily feed by sugar craving. For the crunchy demon I normally go for nuts...very crunchy and I rationalize that they are also protein.

The surgery "fixed" my stomach but not my mind. The food craving...obsession is still there. I must deal with it on a daily basis. That's what this blog is about.